921 Candle Co.

I started a candle company!!! I have been interested in essential oils ever since my interest in holistic living was piqued. It began with research on natural cures for asthma for my son that spurred into a full out research for natural living as a whole. Essential oils fascinated me so much I bought a fragrance lamp and started experimenting with oil blends and using my family as unsuspecting guinea pigs. I gauged their moods and ailments and how they were affected by the oils I burned.

In my research on asthma I found out beeswax candles purify the air. Beeswax, unlike soy, paraffin, and many other waxes, is pure, safe, and the only one that is beneficial to burn. All other waxes, along with synthetic fragrance oils, are actually toxic, so as they burn they are polluting the air we breathe. Just a bit about a few different waxes:

Beeswax: an all-natural, renewable resource that is organic in nature. Beeswax candles burn hotter, longer, brighter, and cleaner than other candles and draw airborne contaminants into the flame.

Paraffin: a greyish black sludge that is a by-product of the petroleum refining process. It is treated, colored, and scented with toxic chemicals. When burned, carcinogens fill the room with fumes that have been compared to that of fumes from a diesel engine.

Gel Candles: made from mineral oil, a petroleum based product, and a gelling agent. Synthetic colors and scents are added that produce toxic fumes when burned.

Soy Wax: not a wax at all, but hydrogenated soybean oil. Soybean oil is heated to a high temperature (140-225 Celsius), and then introduced to hydrogen and nickel (a suspected carcinogen) as a catalyst to solidify the oil. Synthetic colors and scents are added that produce toxic fumes when burned.

Okay, enough with the school session. It’s very apparent why I chose to go with beeswax even though it is a bit pricier than the others! It also has a natural aroma that only enhances the scents of the organic essential oils I use. Organic essential oils are more expensive than fragrance oils, but they are worth their costs. What started as an interest has turned into an all-out company. I have experimented different kinds of beeswax, tested numerous scent combinations, failed miserably with trying to find wicks strong enough to handle the thickness of beeswax, burned my wrists more times than I can count, and had to become a scientist to come up with just the right combinations of wax and oil. Too much wax and not enough essential oil produces candles with very faint scents, and too much essential oil produces candles that literally catch on fire.

There were times I wanted to quit, and did, because it seemed I was in over my head. I’ve started over so many times I have lost count, but I am glad I did. The customer reviews were reward enough for me, and I will list a few of them below. I am working on a few new blends which include one for migraine relief, but I have perfected the ones I currently sell, which are:

Mellow Out:  lavender and lemongrass (tranquility, calm, peace, stress relief)

Lion’s Roar: cinnamon and ginger (drive, ambition, motivation, and confidence. I burn this one frequently. It always leaves me feeling like Wonder Woman ready to take on the world. I entitled it Lion’s Roar because when I created it I had the throat chakra in mind. I wanted it to help people find their voices and be heard!)

Lady Sensuality: vetiver, patchouli, and jasmine (this one is an acquired taste but those that like fine rich fragrances will love this one)

Clean and Clear: sage, lemon, and bergamot (this one aides in mental and spiritual cleaning and clearing)

Gout Away: juniper and clary sage (I created this one for my mom because she suffers with gout. It always aids in relieving the pain and alleviating the accompanying swelling)

The two ounce candles are $12, and the four ounce candles are $24. If you are interested in purchasing feel free to email me at: LCHANTAYN@GMAIL.COM. Mellow Out is a crowd favorite.

Customer Reviews:

"I felt extremely calm and relaxed while burning the Mellow State of Mind. My sinuses were also cleared." - K. Carter

"Mellow State of Mind felt really good to my nose. I felt relaxed as it burned." - S. Beagle

"The scent was really great." - T. Rollins

"It left a calming feeling in my house and it alleviated the pain and swelling associated with my gout." - M. Banks

"I burned Lion's Roar overnight. The next morning I awoke feeling empowered and determined. I also like the crackling sound of the wooden wick." - Anonymous "I felt extremely calm and relaxed while burning the Mellow State of Mind. My sinuses were also cleared." - K. Carter

"Mellow State of Mind felt really good to my nose. I felt relaxed as it burned." - S. Beagle

"The scent was really great." - T. Rollins

"It left a calming feeling in my house and it alleviated the pain and swelling associated with my gout." - M. Banks

"I burned Lion's Roar overnight. The next morning I awoke feeling empowered and determined. I also like the crackling sound of the wooden wick." - Anonymous"I felt extremely calm and relaxed while burning the Mellow State of Mind. My sinuses were also cleared." - K. Carter

"Mellow State of Mind felt really good to my nose. I felt relaxed as it burned." - S. Beagle

"The scent was really great. Within an hour I felt every single thing the candle was meant to do." - T. Rollins

"It left a calming feeling in my house and it alleviated the pain and swelling associated with my gout." - M. Banks

"I burned Lion's Roar overnight. The next morning I awoke feeling empowered and determined. I also like the crackling sound of the wooden wick." – Anonymous

"Loved the candles and need more. They help me sleep and relax! Thank you." – J. Adams

The Queen Bee Effect

You know her. She’s the spunky confident woman, full of life, and passing out genuine compliments that make the receivers feel worthy and honored to have received her blessings. Men swoon over her, and women want to be her.

Though some women find it hard to like her, mostly out of jealousy, others find her endearing. She has come to grips with knowing she isn’t everyone’s cup of tea and is often judged before she even opens her mouth. Hers is a finely tuned balancing act of effusing fierce confidence and self appreciation while simultaneously building other women up.

Her je ne sais quoi lies in her genuineness and hearty lust for life. She’s happy when the women around her are confident and comfortable in their own skins. It is her personal mission to empower other women because she knows she loses no power by doing such. In fact, she gains power. She encourages her fellow double X chromosome bearers to take pride in their appearances, intelligence, femininity, power, and to own themselves and whatever rooms they occupy. She is a supreme Queen Bee.

Key Queen Bee Traits/Tips:

Know your worth and don’t settle. No matter what it is, don’t settle for less than you feel you’re worthy of, be it relationships, friendships, love, money, spirituality, etc. Settling can be draining and cause you to feel emotionally unbalanced.

Get your money right. Flossing in that Beamer and sporting a Gucci bag doesn’t make much sense if those are your only assets. Learn about budgeting, investing, and bring in more than you spend out. Poverty is spending more than you bring in. Be the controller of your income and financial destiny.

Know when to let go. Don’t hang on to things and people that have met their expiration dates in your life. Make room for the people and things that will continue on with you on your journey to greatness. The people that are meant to be in your life will be there.

Don’t be afraid to say no. No is not a bad word. In fact, it can be a sanity saver. You may get called mean from time to time, but I would rather be referred to as such and have my sanity that to be called nice and be miserable because I signed up for something that I really didn’t want to. One of my personal mottos is: I never do anything I don’t want to do.

Don’t forget about yourself. Take good care of yourself. You are no good to anyone else if you aren’t first good to yourself. Set aside a portion of your income, no matter how small, for yourself. I am sure to set aside funds for my bi-monthly mani/pedi, wine, dark chocolate, and an occasional pair of shoes, dresses, jewelry, or anything else that makes my heart sing. Pampering yourself and practice good mental care. You’ll thank yourself, and you’ll also breathe life into all you come in contact with because you do things for yourself that make you feel good.

Try that thing/those things that you really want to do but are afraid to do. Your life is yours and yours only. You only get one shot at this. Make it worth it! There is hardly anything like the adrenalin rush of facing a fear to make you feel alive.

Keep jealousy far away from you. It’s a hell of a beast and causes people to act in the strangest of ways. Never envy what another has. If anything, use that as proof that you, too, can have whatever you put your mind to, just please don’t set your mind on taking another woman’s man. Notice the signs of jealousy in the people around you. It can help you to expediently rid yourself of the people drilling holes in the boat of your happiness. Trust your gut instincts. Of course there will always be people in the background that will secretly and not so secretly hate on you. My advice for that is to Kanye shrug, don your fiercest pair of high heels and dopest red lipstick, and wink at the naysayers as you strut past them.

Do whatever it takes to feel powerful, bold, sexy, or however you want to feel. Put other women on!!! Empower without losing power. Confidence is sexy, and I believe it’s contagious. Inspire another woman to come into her own Queen Bee-ness. Breed life. What you then create is a ripple effect…The Queen Bee Effect.

“I’m fly as a bumblebee buzzzzzz, can’t nobody fuck wit’ me.” – Erykah Badu (Southern Gul)

Wishing you a bubbly and sweet life!
-Q

Go-Getter Girl

I am a firm believer of working for what you want out of life and not accepting substitutes and settling for less unless you absolutely must. There is much power in being a go-getter and seeing the fruits of your labor. What exactly is a go-getter? Merriam-Webster defines it as: a person who works very hard and who wants very much to succeed; an aggressively enterprising person. The online dictionary defines it as: an enterprising, aggressive person. It also defines it as: an ambitious enterprising person. I like to think I fit these descriptions, so I would like to teach you a little of what I know about laying the foundation to living a sweet and bubbly life of go-getting.

The first thing I suggest is defining what it is you want no matter how great or small. I’ll use myself as an example. As many know, when I divorced my husband I was left with absolutely nothing, not so much as a bed for my two children. I had very little clothing and shoes, and the same went for my children. I would say we had about fifteen outfits and seven pairs of shoes between the three of us. I moved in with my parents for about a week until my apartment was ready. When we moved in we had no furniture other than a twin sized bed for my oldest son and a playpen for my youngest to sleep in. On the weekends they stayed with their father I worked overtime at the office. After about two months we had a fully stocked kitchen with a very nice dinette set, a sofa, and a love seat, and my aunt donated us a television. I used some of the monies I received from my income tax refund as a down payment for a car, which brings me to settling.

When I left I had no car, and my credit was shot to hell, which meant I had to start all the way over. The only reasonable car I would leave that lot in was a Toyota Camry that was about seven years old with over one hundred thousand miles on it. My plan was to only keep it one year and trade it in for an upgrade, and I also knew my father would be able to do maintenance on it should it be required. Long story somewhat shortened, I went from a Camry, to an Altima, to a BMW 328is, and now a Mercedes Benz GLK. I am not bragging, and I am not driving my dream car yet, but I am getting there because I refuse to settle in life, even on something as small as what I drive. My children’s and my wardrobes are also pretty nice now. By the beginning of next year we will also be in our own house.

My second suggestion after defining what it is you want is to come up with various routes/options to get there. I am a strategist and a thinker. There is more than one way to skin a cat. If things don’t work out the way you initially intended don’t lose heart. Just go back to the drawing board or on to Plan B, C, D, or however many it takes to get there, but do NOT take no as an answer, and do NOT let anyone piss on your parade, not even yourself. If you fail the first time, take a day or two to lick your wounds and get back at it. You will thank yourself in the end. That brings us to my next suggestion.

Exhaust all your resources. I learned the hard way that it is okay to ask for help, and it is okay to ask questions in general. I am sure I annoy many people with all the questions I ask, but I ask anyway in addition to doing my own research. Become knowledgeable about what it is you are going after and seeking for. Ask. Ask. ASK!!! Talk to people in general. You may just happen to luck yourself into a conversation with a person that has exactly what you need. I do not, however, suggest you going around talking to people solely to find out if they can be beneficial to you. That can quickly thrust you into the opportunist category. I don’t know many people that like to be around or keep the company of people that only want to exploit them and what they may have to offer. Be sincere and genuine when dealing with people. It can take you far, and people are more apt to help and be of assistance to you. That being said, I also am not above using charm to get what I want. A little sweetness and demure demeanor can help get your foot in the door, but never let that drive you all the way. Inside that demure package is a boss on a mission but also a woman all about building authentic relationships along the way.

Then bask in your accomplishments and revel in the beauty of being a woman. Live richly in that. Repeat the process all over again when you get a new goal. Don’t get stale. Become all that you are capable of becoming. Be a self actualized woman. Have fun, learn about yourself, explore your thoughts, listen to your gut, and just live.

I would like to leave you with an article I found online. You can find the entire article here.

Characteristics of Self-Actualized People

v  Acceptance and Realism: Self-actualized people have realistic perceptions of themselves, others and the world around them.

v  Problem-centering: Self-actualized individuals are concerned with solving problems outside of themselves, including helping others and finding solutions to problems in the external world. These people are often motivated by a sense of personal responsibility and ethics.

v  Spontaneity: Self-actualized people are spontaneous in their internal thoughts and outward behavior. While they can conform to rules and social expectations, they also tend to be open and unconventional.

v  Autonomy and Solitude: Another characteristic of self-actualized people is the need for independence and privacy. While they enjoy the company of others, these individuals need time to focus on developing their own individual potential.

v  Continued Freshness of Appreciation: Self-actualized people tend to view the world with a continual sense of appreciation, wonder and awe. Even simple experiences continue to be a source of inspiration and pleasure.

v  Peak Experiences: Individuals who are self-actualized often have what Maslow termed peak experiences, or moments of intense joy, wonder, awe and ecstasy. After these experiences, people feel inspired, strengthened, renewed or transformed.

The Quiet Ones

“Oh, it’s those quiet ones you have to watch. They’re sneaky.” I hated when people told my mother that in regard to me when I was a child. I was indeed a quiet one, but I wasn’t secretly bad. My mother’s advice to me as I became an adult was, “It’s the quiet woman minding her own business that gets the men’s attentions.” Well said, Mommy. Well said.

I have quite a few guy friends, and the overall general consensus is that my mother was correct. Most men prefer women that are not too loud or trying hard to be seen. According to the men whose brains I picked, they enjoy the company of women that are mild mannered, won’t embarrass them in public, and know how to keep it lady-like and classy even whilst engaging in libations.

The thing is, quietness lends an air of mystery and intrigue. When you aren’t an open book people don’t know how to take you, so they tread lightly. Ever notice how loud people are rarely if ever deemed mysterious? Their triggers are easily figured out, and thus, they are mastered by others. When you are calm and seemingly aloof, you remain in control and most events move in your timing, at your bidding. Most men don’t mind this, and since they are hunters by nature they don’t mind putting in the work it takes to get to know you. The slow reveal will keep most of their attentions longer than those of fast reveals.

So just what is it about the quiet woman that attracts men like moths to flames? Well, for starters she is indeed a rarity. In this age of media over sharing and the general population’s need to know everything about everybody it’s rare you come across a woman that keeps her business, well…her business. That alone seats her head and shoulders above the vast majority. Along with this air of mystery and under sharing comes an air of confidence and self assurance. She isn’t posting lewd photos for ‘likes’ or letting the world in on her every emotional state because she doesn’t need the validation. She can very well validate herself. To men, that is sexy in and of itself, and it also puts them at ease because they know they won’t have to constantly cater to a woman’s low self esteem and drooping ego. 

There is a quote I once read that makes me smile every time I think about it. It isn’t a quote about a quiet woman; rather it is about a nerd. I like to think the two go hand in hand, or at least they are perceived to be one in the same. The quote reads: Generally, the nerd has plenty of time to spend by him or herself, and this can lead to becoming one of two people: One who performs shirtless electric guitar solos on his dorm balcony-played through a Peavey practice amp- as a crowd of onlookers wonder why he's drinking hard lemonade; or one who becomes widely versed in the French language, thus rendering him or her a talented, bilingual master of passion. In my humble opinion, both are tremendously cool. -Kate Williams, of NYLON magazine.

The quiet woman is much like this. Once you get to know her most times you are left in awe and astonishment as you peel back layer after layer of what initially may have come across as a plain bland personality. Do you know how many quiet women blow the minds of the men that take the time to pursue them by simply being themselves and not giving all that they are away during the first conversation? I like to think this is a gift that couples as an intriguing allure, and what woman doesn’t want to be thought of as intriguing? 

My mother is indeed a wise woman, and I am the wisdom of her. Are you hungry for more? Just stick around.

Wishing you a bubbly and sweet life ;-)

-Queen

And They Birthed Queens

I was raised under the tutelage of a gentle yet stern proper Southern Belle, my mother. She continuously told me as a child, "You will be a lady even if it kills me." Her partner in molding, my father, taught me to choose quality over quantity, always keep a job, and never depend on anyone. My idol growing up was the ever astute, classy, polished, refined, and clever Claire Huxtable. I wanted to be just like her. My mother was raising a proper woman, my dad a go-getter, and I was intrinsically attracted to what was already inside of me. All of that formed not just any ol' lady...but a Queen Lady. I'll teach you some of what I know. Come...sip and sup with me.